Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Me? Scared?

I don't know if I'm jittery because of the coffee I just drank or because of the allergy meds I took this morning.  Could be both, or it could be neither.  Or, just maybe, it could be because in less then 36 hours I'll be responsible for carting myself and 8 additional team members to the Bay Islands region of Honduras.  I mean, what's a couple thousand miles amongst friends?  Well, we're friends now; I'm a bit anxious to see what a week in a foreign country will do for those bonds, haha.  Besides, in a group of 5 teens, 2 twenty-somethings, and 2 "older" adults, what could possibly go wrong?

There's a certain element of "what the heck have I gotten myself into" permeating the air.  Do I feel in over my head?  Most certainly.  I've already had most of the pre-trip nightmares.  I woke from a cold sweat the other night thinking I had forgotten everyones passports.  Whoops!

In spite of the small moments of panic (and utter terror), I do sense and know that God has this trip in His hands.  It's just that the closer I get to the time of departure, the less I feel that comfort!  And I suppose that's only human.  Welcome to the chasm between knowing in ones head and also knowing in ones heart!  

This may sound cliche (and it probably is), but I think this is where faith comes into play.  Y'know, the whole sure of what we hope for and certain of what cannot yet be seen thing.  I know what I'm hoping for and I know what I'd like to see.  And I believe God can do all of these things.  I'm just having a hard time knowing that He will (and that there won't be any tragic accidents along the way).

So, off we go into the great unknown.  It's bound to be a wonderful adventure, and, regardless of what happens, I know we will all come back changed.  Perhaps that is really the most important thing anyway. To be anxious is human, to be hopeful is divine!

Until next time...

1 comment:

BK said...

Barry, good stuff man. Keep blogging...its good to have people thinking and sharing. I'm adding you to my blog roll, hope that is cool. Take care.